So I'm thinking of opening up for commissions. Probably ACEOs and they can be done in ink, color pencil, marker, watercolor a combination of any of those. I think I'm going to think on this some more and figure out the details. Mainly, come up with some examples.

It's been far too long since I last updated this journal so I figured I'd just share some pictures of some really cute baby cockatiels.


Albinos are so pretty!

( more under the cut )

Boyfriend has come and gone and now I am sad :( I really enjoyed his visit and in some weird way it really confirmed just how much I love him and I have no clue what I would do without him, even if he is a tad obnoxious at times.

I just found out my boyfriends been planning a "surprise" trip to come up and visit me for a weekend! I'm so fucking excited!

The symptoms that help a doctor identify depression include:

* constant feelings of sadness, irritability, or tension check
* decreased interest or pleasure in usual activities or hobbies check
* loss of energy, feeling tired despite lack of activity check
* a change in appetite, with significant weight loss or weight gain
* a change in sleeping patterns, such as difficulty sleeping, early morning awakening, or sleeping too much check
* restlessness or feeling slowed down check
* decreased ability to make decisions or concentrate
* feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, or guilt check
* thoughts of suicide or death



Let's just say I won't be around much. Currently all I want to do is go to sleep and never ever ever wake up.

I just completed my first successful drawing in Illustrator! I got the picture inked and I finally figured out how to color in it! Sweet!

I can't wait to do bigger and better pieces with Illustrator.

For some reason I've been wanting a dog lately. It's really weird because I'm not really a dog person, I much more of a cat and bird person. I like the animals that are more independent and only come to you when they choose to. They don't love everyone- they pick and choose who will be their people. So when they do want to be with you, it means so much more.

Maybe one day, when the right dog finds me, I'll make a special place for them.

- Food shopping
- Move back into my room
- Finish Psych hw
- Run to Michael's & PetCo
- Finish another ACEO or 2
- Do some sketching & sketch out some thumbnails for a new drawing
- Read & spend time with the bf & birdies
- Sleep :)

Been send out lots of e-mails and making phone calls in hopes of contacting an art therapist I can do work with this summer or do an internship with. Blah. I hate doing all of this.

I think I will be spending lots of time with Coco tonight and doing a lot of drawing while she sits on my shoulder.

Haha, look at me... here I go again forgetting about Livejournal. I think I'm just doomed to ever keep up with it on a regular basis.

But yes, birdies are doing well. Kiwi may be going through "birdie puberty" or basically just outgrowing her baby-ness and becoming a lot more assertive. Meaning, she won't hesitate to use her beak to let me know how she feels. Normally it happens when I try to get her to step up. So I've just been holding my finger a little further away from her, and asking her to step up. I am trying to give her the choice to step up onto my finger and not push her to, unless it's an absolute emergency. But if she wants to step up, she well. If not, she may just open her beak and tell me to go away or just lower her head for scritches instead. So I suppose this method is working for now. I know I hate it when people try to force me to do something I don't want to do, so I understand where this little cheekie is coming from.

Caesar has started to fly to my arm when I tell him to "come" YAY!!!! This bird is just too damn smart!

There are definitely times where I wonder if I'm an empath. And I have yet to decide if this is a gift or a curse. I am able to pick up on one's feelings so well that they often become overpowering and I find myself shedding the tears of someone else's pain. I have noticed that I often pick up on someone's pain and sadness over happiness and joy. I'm guessing it's because people tend to try and hide their unhappiness.

But it's quite a strange feeling being able to connect, especially to animals, when the people around me can't. I'm able to read people's and animals body language to a T and I can tell how a person is feeling without them even telling me. I can tell when they are lying or when they are telling the truth. I can tell when someone is comfortable or uncomfortable. I am also able to "get" someone. I can know who they are before I ever talk to them. And there are things about people that I just know but find myself unable to explain to others. Such as, I have a friend who's autistic and finds that all his friends that are girls don't see him as a potential boyfriend. He asked me why one day and I know why they don't see him a boyfriend material but couldn't explain it. He's just... he's that guy that people want as a friend, nothing more. Or I can tell that person X has this type of personality before I've ever spoken to them.

But yeah, I just read somoeone's post on how much they miss their bird and they found themselves doing an activity they hadn't done since their bird was last here. And I found myself near tears. I've never met this person or their bird, and I sit here at work finding myself fighting tears. This is the exact reason why I can't be a psychologist. I empathize with people too well. I carry everyone's baggage and it weighs me down to the point where I can't function anymore. It's almost pathetic how I can empathize so well with people, which would make me a great psychologist, but at the same time that's why I can't.

I love how it's always when I'm at work or have a large paper to write that my mind wanders and all of a sudden I want to do like a billion other things BUT the thing I have to be working on.

Like right now, I've got this sudden urge to make a website that has profiles for all my pets. Then I'd have one place on the web where I can upload all my pet pictures without them being all over the place.

And not too long ago I sat here thinking "wow, I really want to go look up reference pictures so I can start on some new ACEOs. Ha!

And now I'm thinking about how hungry I am and wondering if I can make it until lunch.

Oh how I love my ADD brain.

Caesar is learning to say "step up" and has oh so kindly taught our green cheek as well. So now I get to listen to Caesar proudly tell himself and the others to "step up" and for Kiwi to mumble "step up" to herself as well as "caesar, step up". My birds make me so happy sometimes. :D

I am tired as all hell right now and all I want to do right now is snuggle up with Kiwi and take a nice long nap. :)

Instead I'm stuck at work doing data entry for next oh, I don't know know... 3 or 4 hrs. *bangs head*

I should be writing a paper right now. I'm sitting my school's computer lab with everything out in front of me and everything all set up but when I look at Word I just keep drawing a blank. It probably doesn't help that I'm really tired and exhausted right now and all I want to do is go to curl up in my bed and go to sleep.

To do:
- write abstract
- finish introduction
- finish conclusion
- drop of notes to history professor

- sleep & then eat. :)

I've been doing a little bit of art here and there when I can find the time.
I'm hoping to have an ACEO and a badge finished by this evening. Yay :)

I find it interesting how some people see me as the biggest help and their hero, whereas I just see myself as barely scratching the surface and never really doing enough.

I helped a friend move to a new apartment over the weekend and since he couldn't really go into his old apartment anymore*, most of the packing and moving was left up to kind friends. I told him of course I'd help. So I ventured over to his old apartment and started helping out in anyway I could. Which to me, is very little, because I'm super weak and can't carry much. So I went about my business and started to pack up as much of his stuff that I could and fill as many boxes I could get my hands on. All while my partner and a bunch of other people were breaking their backs and sweating as the moved furniture and the filled boxes to the cars and trucks. I didn't even break a sweat and I felt like I sat on my ass while everyone else was doing all the work.

Meanwhile, my friend and his father are telling me repeatedly what a great help I am and how I'm their hero and they couldn't have done it without me. Umm... yes they could have. Did I really help out that much? I mean, it didn't really seem like. I was just trying to do what little I could.

But looking back. I did pretty much break down his whole bedroom and get it packed up so everyone could just up and move it and not have to be bothered with chasing down random marbles and nick-knacks to stuff somewhere. I also packed up most of the kitchen and helped move small stuff to the door so all they had do was take 2 steps in, grab what they needed to and move.

I was almost insulted when there would be someone who came to help and just stood there texting on their cell phones instead of helping. At least look like you're doing something, even if you aren't. That's what I did in the beginning, and lo' and behold! I did actually end up doing something.


* His old apartment got taken over by mold, and being that he has asthma and was allergic to it, he couldn't be in his old apartment for more than 30min before he'd start coughing up blood so everyone banned him from entering his old crappy place. We stationed him at his new place so he could start unpacking and setting everything up.

So, I just so happened to be browsing craigslist yesterday, like I normally do out of boredom, and I stumbled upon an add for a black headed caique. Knowing that my partner has been DYING to get a caique since, oh... December or so, I showed him the ad. I gave him the option of perusing it or not. He called up the lady and they only lived 25min away and there is absolutely nothing wrong with the bird. He just so happened to bite the lady twice and now she's too scared to touch him or go near him she wants to find him a new home. She doesn't feel she's cut out for it being that she's so scared of him and can't give him the attention he needs.

After a 45min phone call and a 2hr visit, my partner is absolutely head over heels in love with this little feathered chicken. The two of them clicked so so well. Better than I could ever imagine. The bird was hair surfing like crazy in my partner's hair and whistling for him and even tried to clean his teeth for him. My partner would feed him some waffle or broccoli and afterwards the bird would rub his beak all over his hand to clean it.

So uh.... I think we will be going back to visit this bird again on Wednesday to make sure the the bird still clicks with my partner and then we will most likely be bringing him home. His name is Ceaser and he's only 2 years old, DNA sexed male, and in perfect feather. He does talk a little and makes a wide range of whistles and beeps. But it almost doesn't matter that he talks.

We walked out of their home and my partner just gave me this look like "I want...." and gave me the biggest puppy dog eyes. It's hard to say no when I have never seen my partner get along so well with any other bird but this caique. They're personalities mesh just so well.

School's really been stressing me out lately. I have a shitload of work to do. It's not hard work. It's just a LOT of it. I hoping things will ease up soon because a stressed me = me shutting down.

On the other hand, I have been doing some art in the little bit of spare time that I have. Mainly ACEOs, but that's still something. I'm hoping to do some more this weekend.

And speaking of art, I really need some more icons for this account. Not that I don't like the one and lonely icon I have, I'd just like to have some variety in my life. lol